We do not choose family members, classmates, or co-workers, but we do choose our friendships. To have a friend, we need to learn how to be a friend. As Aristotle so beautifully said friends are two people who have a kinship. We tend to gravitate towards people who we are most alike and share a common bond. We sometimes struggle finding good friends, because as the old sage reminds us at the end of our lifetime, we will be able to count our real friendships on the one hand; sometimes not realizing most of the people in our life are acquaintances.
So, we may ask, what makes a good friendship? Individuals who seem to genuinely care for our best interest, who we can call upon in times of trouble, and a person who we can laugh with at life’s intricacies and enjoy time together. We may share a mutual interest with our friends such as bowling on a Saturday night, liking the same football team, and attend games together, or simply sitting together having an enjoyable conversation over a cup of coffee. Without friendships, our life becomes to feel hollow.
Therefore, it is just as important to maintain healthy friendships as it is to make friends. Like any relationship, communication, honesty, trust, and respect is important in friendships. We may travel down the same road with the same friendships for years. Sometimes we lose touch and reconnect years later. Sometimes we outgrow each other and move on. Whatever the case may be, we must understand the concept of being a good friend to make and maintain friendships to enhance our quality of life. Most importantly, we need to be our own best friend. Sometimes we may not have someone there to reach out to; we must be able to stand on our own.
Just for Today
I will appreciate the friendships I have in my life. I will look for ways to sustain and deepen my friendships. I know to make a friend I must learn to be a friend. Also, I understand how I treat myself will determine how other people will treat me. I know real friendships do not stem by connecting through gossip filled conversations, but through intimacy by disclosure of thoughts, feelings, and life events. By working through conflicts with effective communication is essential to keep the friendship going and growing.
Sometimes I understand friendships end because one or both people involved are on different paths. I will appreciate necessary endings as well as new beginnings as a part of life. For the most valuable friendship is starting with myself through self-care and setting boundaries in all my relationships. By remaining open to meeting new people, there will be opportunities to make new friendships and furthermore, add value to my life.
Just for today, I will appreciate and value my friendships. Most importantly, I will appreciate and value the relationship I have with myself.